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Please refer to the two attachments in uploads first one is the draft that needs to be revised using requirements and guidelines mentioned in the second attachment.


Harita Patel


Professor McKenna

December 11, 2021

Does Technology Make Us More Alone?

In today's culture, a civilization where technology advances at a breakneck pace, technology has become inextricably linked to human life, a vital part of our lives due to the numerous benefits it provides. Education, medicine, transportation, and entertainment all benefit from technological advancements. When people consider how technology affects our society, they immediately think of its beneficial effects. However, Newton's third rule of motion states that "for every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction" (Watson, 2021). While technology is undoubtedly good, it also has negative implications. While the advancement of new technology has enhanced our everyday lives by delivering several advantages, studies have found the more you converse via technology; the lonelier you are likely to feel. I am a firm believer that technology has isolated us as humans and instilled a sense of dependence on it.

Spending excessive time on social media platforms such as Twitter, Instagram, Facebook, and Reddit may trigger sentiments of jealousy and the erroneous notion that others have better and more prosperous lives. As the study demonstrates, the fact that we can see so much happening but cannot participate makes us feel more alone and moves our emphasis away from real-world interactions and toward "stalking" other people's lives (Primack, 2009). It appears as though social media has done the opposite of what it was intended to do: help people feel more connected and engaged in one other's lives even when they are miles apart. However, social media has made individuals feel as though they have been missing out on one other's lives and have gradually forgotten the importance of face-to-face interaction. The fact that we have grown so reliant on the want to know what is happening in other people's lives is tragic; we should concentrate on our own lives, connections, and interactions with other people. "We are sociable beings by nature, but contemporary life tries to compartmentalize us rather than unite us. While it may appear that social media can help fill that social hole, I believe that our study indicates that it may not be the solution individuals were looking for" (Primack, 2009). According to the study, social media "disperses more authentic social encounters" since there is less time for in-person engagement. Isn't it odd that, while social media is meant to bring people closer together, we often neglect to engage with others around us in favor of our phone needs? We are losing touch with our fundamental communication abilities since we no longer engage with one another. We are overly preoccupied with our phones.

Reduced face-to-face contact and more time spent on the computer at the expense of social interaction are two of the primary ways social networking may affect relationships. It's similar to any addictive behavior… when you experience feelings of loss of control, spend significantly more time online than intended, and substitute online relationships for face-to-face relationships, that's when the problems begin," said (Morrison, 2021). Dr. Morrison's conclusions are corroborated by the Relationships Australia study, which found that respondents identified having less face-to-face interaction and spending more time on the computer than with other people as two of the primary ways social networking may impair relationships. Additionally, individuals frequently use social media to avoid reality, but reality ultimately catches up with us, and we realize how alone we are. According to a 2013 poll conducted by corporate training business Vital Smarts, 75% of users have observed an altercation over social media, 20% have reduced in-person contact with someone as a result of what they said online, and 90% feel people are less courteous on social media than in person (Morrison, 2021). Individuals watch situations from behind a screen, as we sit alone on our iPhones, computers, or tablets, not required to make physical contact with others. Isn't that deplorable? When we begin to disregard not only the events occurring directly in front of us, but also the small nuances that contribute to the earth's beauty; when we begin to compare ourselves and our lives to others based on the number of likes on our Instagram images. The civilization has elevated social technology to a level much above that of genuine human contact.

While many believe that social technology is making individuals feel more comfortable, a substantial amount of study has been conducted on the effect of cell phones on relationships. Some argue that they have a beneficial effect—that being able to communicate easily and intimately with a spouse via phone and text makes individuals happier and more confident in their relationships. That, however, may only be one side of the tale. Numerous studies have revealed the negative aspects of cell phones. When a person feels the temptation to check their phone, real-world interactions get dimmed, and the diversion a phone provides one spouse does not make the other partner feel good (Viola, 2021). According to the study published in the journal Psychology of Popular Media Culture, those who were more reliant on their cellphones had decreased confidence in their relationships. Individuals who believe their spouses are too reliant on their devices report feeling less fulfilled in their relationships and are more prone to feel lonely.

As a culture, we will begin to become increasingly isolated if we do not make adjustments in response to our overuse of technology. As the studies demonstrate, we are certainly becoming more isolated as a result of technology; we are destroying human connections as a result of our smartphone addiction and constant checking of social media sites. It is past time for us to acknowledge our errors and commit to change. Stop yourself the next time you grab for your phone. When you're among your buddies, put your phone away and focus on the company of your loved ones. While technology is a wonderful thing, if we do not make changes to our reliance on it, it will rip our society apart.


Morrison C. (2021, November 5). Excessive internet use is linked to depression. ScienceDaily.  https://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2010/02/100202193605.htm

Primack, B. (2009). Association of various components of media literacy and adolescent smoking. American Journal of Health Behavior33(2).  https://doi.org/10.5993/ajhb.33.2.8

Viola, D. M. (2021). Negative health review of cell phones and social media. Journal of Mental Health and Clinical Psychology5(1), 7-18.  https://doi.org/10.29245/2578-2959/2021/1.1232

Watson, T. (2021). Trying to understand Newton’s third law of motion. Physics Education56(4), 046501.  https://doi.org/10.1088/1361-6552/abfb46


The purpose of this assignment is to allow you to practice the most important step of the writing process: the revision process.


Revise and resubmit the argumentative draft you turned in last week. Keep in mind the difference between revision and proofreading and note this is a revision assignment. Take note of the instructor comments on your draft submission and revise your paper as needed. When revising, keep in mind the purpose, audience, and rhetorical expectations of this particular mode. In this case, the rhetorical mode is the classical argument, so refer to the task items from the draft assignment prompt and the lecture for the rhetorical expectations of this essay type. Here is a great, brief resource (Links to an external site.)  from the Purdue Online Writing Lab that breaks the revision process down into manageable steps. 


Your revised draft should be at least 1,000 words. Also, after revising your essay, write a paragraph explaining the revisions you made to your draft from last week; mention both global and local revisions. (This paragraph does not count toward your word count. Your essay needs to be at least 1,000 words!) Add this to the end of the essay and label it "Revision Explanation." Turn in your revised paper to the appropriate assignment tab in Canvas. Your paper should be in standard APA format.

Review the Revision Assignment Rubric for details on how this assignment will be assessed by your instructor.

Suggested Organization for a Classical Argument 

1. Introduction: Give the context and background of your issue. Establish style, tone, and significance of your issue.

2. State your case: Clarify your issue here. Give any necessary background for understanding the issues. Define any important terms or conditions here.

3. Claim: State your central claim. Be sure that your hook presents an issue that is open to debate. Present the subtopics or supportive points to forecast your argument for your reader. 

4. Respond to counterarguments: Analyze the opposition's arguments and summarize them fairly. Refute or address the points, point out faulty reasoning and inappropriate appeals, or concede points. Then shift to a different field of values (here your position is strong) and argue for those new values. 

5. Substantiation and proof: Present and develop your own case. Carefully plan your disclosure; avoid logical fallacies. Rely primarily on reasoning for your appeal and use emotional appeals carefully. Use examples, facts, experts, and statistics. Develop your argument using the appropriate prose strategy (e.g., causal analysis, comparison, analogies, definitions). 

6. Conclusion: Conclude with conviction. Review your main points and state your claims strongly. Make a strong plea for action or invite your readers to refute your argument.